im so tired. these days all i ever do is sleep. i have not been a good gf or scandal girl to my bootie call lately. always missing in action. its only because besides sleeping all day, i also had my face buried in a book. yes. im currently and almost done wit eclipse. im so addicted to the series like bees to flowers, flies to rubbish and my gf to her fiance. sorry. i just have to let that out. i have to force myself to understand that regardless of age, everyones gotta get tied down. i just cant believe how sooner it got.

it didnt help that my r/s wit my bf is deteriorating. his father passed away. and i cant be there to comfort him. im the most useless gf any guy will ever want. the night before his father died, we quarreled. again. and this time its not him. its me. i almost broke up wit him. but i did not. coz at that time is father was already sick. and i didnt want to make things worse. so i hung up on him. he called me back. i picked up the fone. but i was silent. i didnt feel like talking, really. not that i was being rude. _{y dont u fuck off? like forever?}

so the next day i told my bootie call. and he was worried. what if my bf actually got the money his late father left him, and what if he marries me? ARE U INSANE?! i cant even take care of myself, let alone a husband????

really stupid. i hate when ppl tell me stupid things. things beyond believable. it drives me to the core of the earth.

i really dont feel like having a bf now. not even for sex. im so tired of